


Never Falling

by Renaisty



Series: beside the river of truth [2]
Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Aftermath, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Sokovia Accords, Some pining, What-If, guest starring sam wilson, hints of peter/ned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-08
Updated: 2017-12-08
Packaged: 2019-02-12 04:17:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12951111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Renaisty/pseuds/Renaisty
Summary: He'd thought he would be okay. That everything could go back to the way it had been.He couldn't do this anymore. He just wanted not to be alone, not to feel so painfully small and insignificant against what seemed like the whole world.After everything, things are not quite alright.





	Never Falling

**Author's Note:**

> Of course, here I am again. Couldn't stay away. I wanted to show the aftermath of Never Simple, so this is the 'sequel' if you will. I suppose you don't really need to read the first one to get what's happening, but it would provide the background for this, emotionally and story-wise. And, well, it would make me happy.
> 
> Title from the quote 'Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.'
> 
> Enjoy, and tell me what you thought! Constructive criticism is always welcome.

It was cold, and bright, blinding light that hurt to look at. The world got smaller and colder and shrank until it. Just.

Stopped.

Existing.

…

Peter woke up suddenly. There was pleasant warmth around him, and a steady presence at his side. The only light in the room was coming from the small lamp in the corner.

Ned was sleeping, head leaning on Peter's shoulder. Peter didn't remember having a blanket before, but now the designated 'couch blanket' was draped over them. He was pretty sure May had been the one to cover them while they were sleeping.

They'd fallen asleep with the TV on, again. That tended to happen, especially after the third time rewatching one of their favourite movies.

He carefully craned his neck to look at the clock. It was 4 in the morning, and he silently thanked his luck that the nightmare hadn't woken Ned. With how much he'd been working on school stuff lately, he needed all the sleep he could get.

The nightmares were becoming more intense. At first, it was memories, or something close to it. Then, the others started fading away, leaving him alone and scared for no reason he could think of.

When he was awake, he knew why the fear was so intense. In the dreams, there was no hope, no escape, no Captain America to appear from the darkness. No May waiting with open arms, or Ned with a warm hug. There was only the Raft, big and hulking and tiny and suffocating all at once.

"Peter?" came Ned's sleepy voice from right next to him. "You awake?"

"Yeah," Peter said, quietly.

"We need to stay awake at least once," he yawned. "What's the point of rewatching if we miss the end?"

Peter patted him on the shoulder mock-reassuringly. "Someday, we will."

Ned frowned, eyebrows drawing together in concern. "Your hand is shaking," he said.

"Is it?" Peter laughed nervously. "Looks like I'm getting old."

While his friend was laughing, he held his hand up to the faint light for a moment. Ned was right.

…

He wanted to tell Ned.

He wanted to tell someone, about everything. Not just vague 'it was dangerous' stuff, but rather, every detail.

It hadn't been enough. The cover story they'd made up worked perfectly, but that was the problem. May and Ned hadn't asked many questions, and even those they had, Peter answered with half-truths and almost lies. It had just been 'a bad time'.

He'd thought he would be okay. That everything could go back to the way it had been. But the nightmares were getting worse, more frequent, his instincts were going haywire at all times of the day, he shook at the very thought of the world knowing who he was. And the truth was eating him up, clawing at his insides and yearning to come out.

Some evenings when May was at work, he found himself pacing in front of the bathroom mirror.

"I mean, nothing happened. I was scared, yeah, very scared. I thought I'd never get out. That I'd have to watch them torture Wanda forever. That Ross lied about the out, and would rather run his tests forever. He was part of the reason this happened to Dr Banner, wasn't he?"

The curtain flapped in the breeze, and he hurried to shut the window completely. The sunlight outside was blinding, leaving burning afterimages behind, that he could see every time he blinked.

"How could they trust him with people's lives and rights? Oh right, because they don't actually want the world to be safe, they're just scared of anyone who's not like them. Even the 'normal' humans were locked up like they'd tried to destroy the world, like. How could anyone arrest superheroes for trying to save the world? But so many governments agreed to this. Am I missing something? I read the whole thing, didn't I?"

Peter stopped pacing, resting his head on the sink's rim.

"Maybe they just wanted the power and didn't care about the individual people they were screwing over."

The mirror said nothing.

It didn't exactly make everything better, but he felt lighter. Even though the mirror didn't speak, or reassure him that things were okay. And if he was honest, it would be pretty worrying if he heard mirrors talk.

Some days, he'd prop up the mask of the suit, dare himself to put it on.

Two days after he got back, he'd gone out on patrol. It had been a quiet afternoon; he'd stopped a couple of muggings, then a car that almost flipped over. As soon as he'd landed on a rooftop, the world swayed. Suddenly, the concrete had turned to churning waves, no end in sight and only unforgiving metal beneath his feet.

He'd gone home quickly after that.

Now he didn't dare put the suit on, fearing he'd be more of a hindrance than a help; get himself killed. The only good thing about it was that Ned and he were finally getting more time together again. Watching movies, working on homework or Legos and avoiding the elephant in the room made for great afternoons.

If only Ned was a little less smart. Not that Peter would change his best friend for anything in the world.

…

'The equation _Accords > Raft > Avengers_ has no solution if _Avengers_ = __'

His pencil broke in half. He shoved the two pieces under the textbook, then got up to get another one from the desk. When he turned back, Ned was staring at him.

"Peter, please."

"What is it?" he asked, feigning calm. "Is it 59? That was a nightmare to solve."

"No, man, I solved it ages ago."

Ned sat up on the bed, pushing aside the math. He had a determined look on his face; that never ended well. The last time he'd seen it, Flash had stopped bothering them for a whole week.

"This is due tomorrow, you know," he said, sitting on the bed again. He made a motion to go for the discarded homework, but Ned pushed it further away.

"I know. I know, but please, Peter." For a moment, it sounded like he was done, like that was all it would be, and Peter's hope and dejection grew. But he wasn't.

"What's wrong?" Ned asked, almost desperate. "You're scaring me. It's, it's been weeks, almost a month. I thought- you'd get over it, but it just keeps getting worse." He looked like he couldn't find the words, but when they came it was like he wasn't even thinking about it. "I don't know how to help you. I thought, 'hey, I'll just wait for him to tell me,' but you never did. I thought you're supposed to not bother people when they go through stuff like this. I tried, I did, I'm sorry. Please," Ned implored, raising his hand as if to touch him, but pulling it away at the last second.

Like Peter was something that would burn him, or something he could shatter.

"What's going on?"

The fear and affection on his face almost made Peter break then and there.

He couldn't do this anymore. He could keep all the secrets, but it would destroy him. He just wanted not to be alone, not to feel so painfully small and insignificant against what seemed like the whole world.

"Alright," he said, and Ned's expression relaxed into one of fearful anticipation. "It's not… Are you sure you want to know?"

"I'm sure," Ned breathed, like his friend was afraid raising his voice would scare him away. Peter was more worried about the opposite.

He didn't know where to begin. Peter looked down at his hands, as if they could tell him what to say, how to tell Ned the things that haunted him so that his friend wouldn't leave. It wasn't the most logical thought, a part of him knew. But Ned was cautious, and law-abiding, and could decide this was too much danger for him.

How much more danger would he be in if he knew Peter's secret?

The thought almost made him stop. This was it, the exact reason he had kept Spider-Man secret. He couldn't jeopardize everything like that, couldn't paint a target on Ned's back, not just for that secret, but for the Accords as well. To what lengths would they go to make sure all of what the Accords allowed to happen was kept under wraps?

Ned put his hand over Peter's, light and steadying to his trembling fingers, and it was too much. Peter couldn't look at him, keeping his gaze focused on their hands but once the words came, quiet and shaky, they didn't stop.

"They locked us up like animals. They called that place the Raft. They had Wanda in a straightjacket and a shock collar and she'd done nothing. I was so _scared_ I was gonna be next that I would sign myself over to whoever the Accords said just to get out. They wanted to experiment on my blood and I don't know what else. Mr Stark couldn't help me, no one could, and Captain America had to break us out. I'm terrified they'll come for me again, and this time, _no one_ will know. I'd be alone forever in some hellhole in the middle of the ocean."

It was over before he knew it. When he stopped, he was breathing hard, heart beating fast. Ned's expression was shifting between horror, awe and disbelief. His hands had tightened around Peter's, to the point where a normal human would be hurting.

But Peter was not a normal human, hadn't been for a while now. And it was becoming the scariest thing in the world.

"Why?" Ned asked, expression almost blank now. "Why you?"

"Because I'm not exactly …a normal human. Not anymore."

Ned's hands loosened, and for a scary moment, Peter thought he'd let go. But as soon as he tried to pull back, Ned held on tighter.

"Not normal how?"

"As in, powers. I want to use them to help people, but. But I'm starting to think it's not worth it anymore," he said, not looking at Ned. "Not with the fear of the Accords and the… and the Raft."

Ned let out a forceful breath, like he'd been holding it back all this time, and suddenly he drew his friend to him, hugging him.

Peter nearly melted in the embrace. Finally, someone knew. And Ned's reaction didn't prove his worst fears right. The weight that had been pressing down on him was starting to ease.

"I'm sorry," Ned whispered. "I don't know how to make it better, or if I can help, but I'll try."

"Just… this is fine," Peter shook his head slightly. "This is enough." He didn't pull away, and Ned didn't look like he wanted to, so they stayed like that for a few minutes. Slowly, Peter's heartbeat returned to its normal rhythm and, for the first time in a while, the tension bled completely out of his muscles.

"So…" Ned started, after a while. "Are your powers at least cool?"

"I don't know," Peter almost laughed, and it might have had a hysterical edge to it, but he felt more honestly happy than he had that whole month. "No one complains when I save them."

"When you said you want to use them to help people…" he trailed off, pulling back to look at Peter's face.

"I might be already going out and doing that, yeah."

Ned's eyes closed, expression disbelieving. "Spider-Man?" he asked.

"Yeah. How'd you know?"

"Man, I should've seen it." Ned shook his head, disappointed. "The spider at that field trip, PE whenever you get distracted, your obsession with the Youtube videos…"

"Obsession?" Peter asked, mock-offended. "I wouldn't call it an obsession…"

"You watched one of them twenty times, Peter. Twenty. Times."

He hadn't told Ned any more then. But other nights, they'd huddle under a blanket and it would come back.

The faint smell of bleach in the cell, that he couldn't shake. He had to leave the room or the house whenever May used bleach to clean, head clouded with fear and unable to breathe. The sound of footsteps that made him stay awake at night. The way bright light could make him freak out some days, and the feeling of being watched that left him wanting to curl up in a non-threatening ball of nerves.

"I'm sorry," he said, in the dark. "Sorry for dumping this on you."

"What are friends for?" Ned asked. "And anyway, if," he paused, "and that's a very big _if_ , okay? If you disappear at some point, I'll raise hell. Doesn't matter who it is, I'll make _damn_ sure they won't keep you."

"You mean that?"

"Absolutely."

Peter's eyes burned. "It would be too dangerous, though. If… anything happens, promise me you'll be safe. I want you to be safe more than I want to stay out of that place."

The words felt like a lie, when his fear of the Raft still kept him awake at night, but he stood by them. May and Ned were his world, and for them, he'd do anything.

…

A couple of days later, an old mailman knocked on their door. The small, unassuming package only contained two things; a grey, old-looking flip phone and a piece of paper.

_They can't track this phone. There's only one number in it. If they come after you, you can call us._

_The others say hi._

_Sam_

Peter actually laughed out loud in surprise and relief. They were alright.

He'd wondered, for a while. He'd had no idea of where they were or what they were doing, or even if they managed to evade capture. He couldn't be sure they'd make the news public, given the division of opinions on the subject. All he'd heard since had come a couple of days after their escape; that they were 'at large' and 'considered highly dangerous, especially Rogers and Maximoff'.

But this, this was proof that things were okay; as okay as they could be.

He stuffed the phone in his backpack first. Then he reconsidered; the backpack was the easiest thing he could lose. No, it had to be either in the apartment, or in his locker at school. Somewhere only he could get to.

Or maybe not. The last time they'd got him, it had only taken them a couple of minutes. He couldn't be sure he'd make it to the phone if they came, especially since he wouldn't have it on him. If they were too fast, Ned could call Falcon and the rest of the Rogue Avengers. He'd probably love it.

('And it can be enough to stop him from trying to help any more,' a small voice whispered in his head.)

That night, he stayed up late thinking about them. Were they okay? Physically, probably yes. And when he last saw them, they'd seemed okay. But, so had he. And the nightmares came, along with the jumpiness and the fear.

Did Wanda wear necklaces now? Did they ever feel like the world was getting smaller? Could they sleep with the door closed? They were older, he reasoned, more experienced, had more ways of dealing with things like that. Maybe they were doing fine.

Maybe they weren't.

…

'Did you see what he can do? We can't let him go. Not without the Accords controlling him.'

No wait. Stop.

'He's inhuman. What if he hurts someone?'

Never. Don't.

It hurts. Like fire in his veins. He can't breathe, coughing and choking when something tightens around his neck.

He tries to fight, but he's in limbo. There's nothing there but a million sparks lighting up his blood as the pain goes on. And on. And-

He woke up on the floor, tangled up in the sheets. He didn't get up immediately, the nightmare having left him shaky and breathless.

Why couldn't he stop being afraid of what _might_ happen? Hadn't reality been enough, without adding nightmare scenarios to the mix? None of these things had ever happened, and maybe they never would.

It did happen, he corrected himself. All of it. Just… not to him.

That didn't matter.

He dragged the covers back on the bed, not sparing a look at the clock before getting back under them. With any luck, he could fall asleep again soon and not end up looking like a zombie in the morning, though it was doubtful.

There was a soft knock on the door. If he'd been asleep, there's no way he would have heard it.

"Peter?" May asked. Her voice was worried, still low with sleep.

"Sorry May, just… a nightmare. We have a test tomorrow."

"Good luck," she said. He expected her to turn and leave, but she stayed just outside the room. A few seconds later, she gently pushed the door to open. It hadn't been shut, so it only creaked slightly in the quiet.

"You know you can tell me if something's wrong."

"Yeah, of course," Peter said.

In the dim light from the hallway, May's form seemed big, as if she could chase away all the imaginary monsters. He desperately wished that were true.

"You don't do that though. I was worried that you didn't have anyone to talk to, that whatever this is-" she halted suddenly.

" _Was_ worried? Like, before?"

She made a gesture toward the bed, and Peter shrugged. It was unlikely that he'd get much more sleep anyway. He never did, after a nightmare.

May sat on the bed, without turning on the light. They could still see, but the blanket of near-darkness meant something like safety, like trust.

"Ned's different. Something has changed between you two, and I'd think it was the obvious but…" Peter carefully didn't choke at that. 'The obvious' could be a lot of things, but considering it was May saying it, all of them had something to do with his tiny crush on his best friend. He _wished_ that was what was going on. "I know you told him what you won't tell me. I hope that's enough."

Peter suddenly felt horrible. May definitely had not been fooled by the act he was putting on, and her concern had probably not been assuaged when Ned started keeping secrets from her too. But he couldn't tell her. Ned was one thing, he could worry, he could help or give advice, or just be a listening ear.

May could put a stop to Spider-Man. She could look him in the eyes, tell him never to put on that suit again, and he would try to do it. However, no matter how out-of-balance he felt now, Peter knew that at some point, he'd go out again. He couldn't just stop being Spider-Man. He had the power to help, and he'd make sure to use it.

Just as soon as he left the Raft business behind.

God, he wanted to tell her. If only to stop the worry that seemed to radiate off her.

"I'm sorry," he said instead. Her knowing would just put more weight on her shoulders. "It's nothing, just, you know, teenager things."

She sighed. "Then you're telling me that all of this did not start when Tony Stark took you away for an 'internship opportunity'? Should I stop composing the child endangerment lawsuit that I've been thinking about for the last month?"

For a moment, Peter was speechless. He had no idea that May wanted to press charges. "Yes, you should," he said, fighting to keep his voice steady. He didn't raise his voice, no matter the fear that suddenly gripped him. "He didn't know what would happen, and I was alright anyway."

He was lying to her face. Mr Stark had signed the Accords. Peter could only imagine that he had read them beforehand. Maybe he hadn't paid much attention to the parts that didn't concern him, the articles about enhanced individuals who didn't sign. He refused to consider that Mr Stark had taken him to Germany knowing what could happen.

And Peter hadn't been 'alright'.

"Please don't lie to me," May said as she turned on the lamp. Now he could see her expression, and it was tired and worn. "I was told the Avengers fought over the Accords, and you were 'regrettably involved in an altercation'. But I _know_ the whole thing happened somewhere in Germany, no matter how much all of you try to convince me you never left New York." She paused, and Peter wanted to come up with an excuse, but more excuses might only make it worse. "You still don't have a passport Peter," she said, and she looked like she was giving up.

Maybe she was; giving up the façade of ignorance, that had allowed them to continue on like normal even after Peter had returned falling apart.

"If it helps, before things went… bad, I was having fun." At least that was true.

"It doesn't, sweetheart. You came back crying and scared, and you haven't stopped looking over your shoulder since. You've stopped sneaking out," she said, "and yes, I know you used to. You have nightmares and they're getting worse, and even though you're doing better at school, you always have this empty look in your eyes. It's scaring me, Peter."

She took a deep breath, letting it out. She obviously expected something, an answer, a justification, but Peter had none. None that wouldn't make her fear and worry worse, anyway.

May shook her head, not looking at him. "At first," she said quietly, "I thought Stark had… _done_ something. You didn't want to get in contact with him, and with everything else… I worried that it was all a lie to cover up what he did. I hated myself, for letting him take you."

Peter wanted to vehemently deny it, but it was so absurd he couldn't even get his brain to come up with the words. Out of everything she could have assumed, it was the one thing he'd never even considered.

"Then, I realised it was something else. You were so concerned about the campaign against the other Avengers, and every time the Accords are brought up-" he flinched- "you freak out. Is there something I should know? Is someone after you?" She looked him in the eyes, laying her hand on his forearm. "Is there _anything_ I can do?"

The depressing answer was no; almost nothing. Peter himself couldn't do much, powers or not. That was a scary thought. So, he just hugged her, feeling wet, hot droplets fall on his t-shirt.

"I love you," he said, and May laughed wetly against his shoulder. "You're the best. You're always there for me, and that's… that's enough, okay?"

"Is it? I feel like a failure. I can't protect you from everything, and I obviously can't even help you afterwards."

"Sure you can," he argued. "If it wasn't for you I don't know if I…" If he'd have got out of there. "All day, every day, you're the one that keeps me going. I know that I'm doing the right thing because of you, you know? Because of all you've taught me."

"Aw, don't butter me up now," she said, the last traces of tears still in her voice. "If anyone," she whispered fiercely, tightening her hold, "tries to hurt you, they'll find me waiting. I'm here for you."

"I'm here for _you_ ," he told her. He wanted to hug her tighter too, but didn't trust himself in that moment. "I'll always do everything to help you. It's just you and me."

"It's just you and me," she repeated back to him, like she always did. Like he always did, when she said it first.

It was their promise. Had been, for the past several months. They'd get through this too; as long as they were together.

…

After that, things were better. He hadn't noticed, but the unspoken acknowledgment of the lies that were being told had made the house just that little bit colder. With both of them more or less on the same page, the tentative peace had turned into a real one.

It made him feel more secure, more stable, enough to consider, maybe, going out again. But he wasn't sure he could trust himself alone. That's why he talked to the only other person he could.

Everything Ned was holding didn't exactly _drop_ ; no, the papers fell gently in arcs to scatter on the bedroom floor.

"Yes?" he said, as if it was absurd to even ask. "Absolutely? I'll level with you," he grinned, "I've been thinking about it ever since we talked. I just didn't want to push you into doing something you were not ready for." Peter must have looked at him strangely, because he sighed. "Look, everyone has a guy in the chair. You know, the person behind the screen who can tell you the fastest way out of a burning building?"

"Pretty sure Thor doesn't have a 'guy in the chair'…"

"Are you actually comparing yourself to Thor?" Ned asked, very seriously but with a small smile tugging at his lips, and Peter had to agree with the sentiment.

"No, no you're right."

He wasn't anything like Thor. Thor was almost a literal god, with unimaginable power and an air of control about him. He was the master of his destiny. Peter had been feeling his own fate slip further away from him every minute for a while now. It was slowly getting better, but that didn't change the facts.

"You've already made the offer though; no takebacks."

"Wouldn't dream of it."

That was true. Ned's excitement was already rubbing off on him. A minute ago, Peter would have put on the suit only out of a sense of responsibility. Now, his heart was beating faster with anticipation, and he longed to share the feeling of flying through the air with his best friend.

He could do that even physically, he thought. If Ned wanted, he could pretend to save him, take him for a ride around Queens, by web.

It was too dangerous to do anything else, at least while the Accord were in place.

The phone, for as long as he'd had it on him, had been burning in his pocket. Now it was temporarily stashed at the back of his closet, among some of his old games. There were at least two other similar phones there; they'd belonged to May and Ben, and Peter had kept them to play with when they'd upgraded to newer models, before he had his own phone. Ned hadn't exactly made fun of him, considering it did involve Ben, but it had been a near thing.

Ned dug around inside his backpack, taking out a small, black device, a little like an earbud.

"This is connected to my laptop, and I like to think I'm making it at least hard for any amateur to track the signal."

Suddenly, Peter regretted even thinking about this. Now Ned was officially _involved_ , aiding and abetting. But he didn't want to ruin his good mood, or Ned's excitement, so he dismissed the thought, staying still to let Ned put the earpiece in correctly.

His friend's concentrated expression was cute as always, and Peter very carefully didn't let the wide smile that wanted to form show. The urge to lean forward increased the longer Ned's face remained inches away from his own.

Peter didn't give in to the impulse. For one, for the last couple of months, he'd been crushing on Liz, the- in his opinion- smartest, most beautiful girl at school. It was stupid, because in what universe would Liz be interested in him, but it felt a bit like betraying her. Also, he had no idea how Ned would react. His friend was very open about his type, and it leaned towards Black Widow. Maybe it was a tad unrealistic, but Peter didn't even come close either way.

"Peter?"

"Sorry, I got… distracted."

"I was just asking," Ned said, a bit concerned, "are you sure about this?"

"Yeah," Peter answered, like it was no big deal. "Yeah, of course. Besides, you'll be there. I couldn't ask for a better friend."

"Aw, you'll make me cry."

He'd thought after telling Ned, there'd be a bit more time, while they were figuring out the logistics. Now that was a moot point, and the possibility of going out that very night was starting to seem very appealing. And why not? Nothing would change in a couple of days.

All he had to do was ignore his nightmares.

Five minutes later, he was ready to go. May wouldn't be home for another two hours, so they were covered on that front. His heart was beating just slightly faster than normal, and his senses were only dialled up to twelve.

For the first time, he faced Ned in the suit. His friend's eyes got huge and full of awe the way no one's ever did, apart from little kids Spider-Man encountered. But only Ned knew him both with and without the mask.

"So, how does it look?"

"Wow," was the only thing to come of Ned's mouth. "Let me just say, thank you for this. For letting me be part of your journey." Ned turned on his laptop, putting on his headset. "You wanna check the connection out? I couldn't really when it was just me, and there's no way I'd ask my sister."

That was… expected. Alice was curious, and pretty good with technology herself, even if her interests for the moment were otherwise aligned. She wouldn't let the matter be until she knew everything about why Ned would need a long-range communication device. And Peter absolutely did not need anyone else knowing his secret.

Darkness was starting to fall, so Peter used the cover to climb out the window. Before long, he was leaning on the wall right under the roof, looking over their neighbourhood. The last-minute special handshake they'd shared lingered with him, both in sentiment and in a feeling on his hand. It was going to be fine.

"Peter? You there? Can you hear me?"

"Loud and clear, Ned." His friend couldn't resist an exhilarated laugh, and Peter smiled at the sound. The lights were turning on one by one, New York slowly transitioning to night.

"Do you think we should use codenames?"

"Hmm, I don't know," he said, firing off a web. "How does Guy in the Chair sound?"

Then he was falling through the air, and Spider-Man was back in town. For real this time.

…

The population of Queens seemed happy to get their superhero back. It still didn't solve any of his bigger problems.

The Accords were gaining more public opposition by the day. At first, the full text hadn't been available to the public. A few days after Leipzig, it was released, only to be combed through by people specialising in international law and be found lacking. Nevertheless, the media, along with the opinion of the general public, were more reserved in their condemnation or support.

Known enhanced people were at an all-time high of under 100 in the entire world. Their reputation was often lacking, and they were routinely blamed for catastrophes and deaths, regardless of if that was true or not. Nobody would go out on a limb for them.

Some, of course, did. Groups had sprung up, mostly on Tumblr and Twitter, advocating for enhanced people's rights, especially the right to privacy. Law firms had gone on record to say that, for a start, they would pursue the just enforcement of Article 12.2 of the International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights, stating that the Accords stance on the matter reflected clear discrimination.

It was something. But it didn't make Peter any less stressed to get out of bed in the morning. Yes, continuing to act as Spider-Man was technically illegal. However, Spider-Man was nothing next to his very existence as an autonomous person with powers being against the law.

"Michelle should be feeling satisfied," Ned commented. He was playing with his pen, trying to solve an equation. They were at Ned's house, for a change, and Peter was trying his hardest not to do homework, while hanging from the ceiling.

He was probably right. Michelle had never liked the Accords, since the moment they were first brought to light, and she made sure everyone knew it whenever it came up.

"Even if you were… not enhanced," Ned paused. "There's just something really fishy about wanting to register and then control the movements of a group of people just because they're different."

"Yeah," Peter said, trying not to think about it. Kinda hard, when he was the one who'd brought the topic up. He was writing an essay, thankfully short, on the subject, and he felt better thinking about the whole thing around someone else. The essay should have been handed in a week ago, but at the rate he was going- a sentence each day- it wasn't likely that he'd hand it in at all.

"Why the right to travel though? Why Article 12.2?"

"You mean, why didn't they go with the lack of legal representation or the cruel and unusual punishment? They probably don't know." Which was maddening, if expected. The Raft was designed to disappear people off the face of the earth, not to give them a fair trial or allow them to garner public support.

Ned grimaced. "I keep forgetting what people know and what they don't. You should see Tumblr, there's a couple really good analyses about it, to the point where it's actually confusing me about how much people know and how much they just suspect." He frowned momentarily. "Or, you know, you should definitely not see Tumblr. At all."

If Ned wanted to dissuade him, he'd just made sure of the opposite. Peter threw him an inquiring look. He hadn't logged on to his account in a while, given everything; last time he had, he'd blacklisted everything to do with the Accords, and even the Avengers.

"Well… Some the most vocal anti-Accords communities are there, but there's a lot of," Ned winced, "a lot of support for them too. People are pretty divided."

Peter almost threw his pen at the wall. As it happened, it was lucky that he didn't just break it in his hand.

"What's there to be divided about?" he asked bitterly.

"I don't know," Ned shrugged. "I think… people are just afraid, and angry. It's easy to blame the ones who were there for the casualties, you know?"

"But it shouldn't be," Peter said. "The Avengers have saved the Earth more than once when no one else could have. Even if they couldn't save everyone."

He knew first-hand the Avengers were not perfect. If they were perfect, New York wouldn't still be recovering from the alien attack. The world would be saved without any casualties. Of any kind. He would have never known what it was like to be in the Raft, nor would any of the others.

"Tell that to them," Ned raised his eyebrows. "Alice says it's Iron Man's and Wakanda's support. People look up to them, especially Wakanda. It's hard to go against your heroes and the people you respect."

Peter felt numb. Mr Stark hadn't denounced the Accords, even after learning about the Raft. Not publicly at least. What he _had_ done was have a message appear in the display of Peter's suit when he first put it on again, warning him to keep a low profile and be careful, showing him where the newly installed panic button was. That was the last he'd heard of him, because Peter wasn't eager to draw attention to himself by associating with Tony Stark. Not again.

"I thought Wakanda was withdrawing," he said, instead of dwelling on whether Mr Stark really knew what he was doing.

Ever since the Rogue Avengers' escape, there had been reports that Wakanda was getting ready to withdraw their support of the Sokovia Accords. Given the country's influence, it could actually be a pretty big step towards the complete abolishment of the agreement.

Maybe Wakanda and Iron Man were working up to a joint withdrawal; backing out at the same time would do great damage to the Accords' standing. While he was pretty sure it was just wishful thinking, it made him feel better.

"Nothing has been 'officially' said," Ned shook his head. "Well, it's next to official that they're 'reconsidering the terms', but that's about it."

"Great. Just… great."

He was tempted to log into his social media, see for himself what people were saying. But none of them had any actual power to change things; it might just make him feel worse. And he didn't want to know just how much it would hurt to see support for what put him and the others in the Raft.

"Also, well, the smear campaign they have going on is working. People think Cap's a criminal, that he went crazy, breaking the law to try and save his buddy," Ned added. "Sorry," he said, when he saw Peter's face fall further.

"We can at least do something about that, right?"

"Except blogging about it and causing doubts in people who believe the government? Nope."

It was a headache. Worse, it was a nightmare.

The people who had the power to change things either were the ones enforcing the Accords in the first place, or they didn't have enough information. Attorneys, as well as human rights advocates and organisations would have a field day to know about what was really going on. The lack of a trial or a defence of any kind, the conditions in which people who'd saved the world were kept, for trying to do it again, the plans for human experimentation, the Raft itself…

"Wait are you actually posting against the Accords?" Peter asked, when he actually processed his friend's words.

Ned lifted his hands in the air with a wide, happy grin that made him look like an angel. "Done!" he exclaimed, closing the Algebra textbook with a slam. "And, yeah, obviously?"

"Aren't you-" No, his brain helpfully provided, Ned wasn't afraid people would show up and take him away, because his DNA was fully human and had nothing strange about it. "It could be dangerous," he amended.

"I do take precautions," his friend said, putting his books in his backpack, to be ready for Monday. "That's what I've always done about the whole thing though, so it's not like I changed my mind. To anyone who cares to examine my blog, nothing should seem out of the ordinary."

With a jolt, Peter realised that was true. From the moment they'd heard of the Accords, only days after he'd got back, Ned had disagreed. Even if he wasn't as outspoken about it as Michelle, it was there.

"But, you love Iron Man." Something that had not been true of Michelle, who was wary of vigilantes in general.

Ned raised his eyebrows in confusion. "Yes? Doesn't mean he's not human. I trust the guy about computers," he rolled his eyes, "I don't blindly support everything _he_ does."

"Huh."

"So," Ned asked, getting back to actual, pressing business, "are you done with that? Because last time, we stopped the game when I was on a winning streak."

"Nope, not done." Peter chucked the half-finished essay in his backpack and took the spare controller. "But who cares, I guess I'll fail."

He couldn't stay much later, since Alice was having a friend over to work on a college paper. But standing in the doorway, with Ned's laugh still echoing in his mind, he wished he had given in to the urge to kiss him.

…

He woke up angry.

Why should they be locked up and controlled, for the simple crime of being alive and wanting to help? What had they done that was so horrible?

Nothing. Earth had been in danger by aliens, and by an AI. The people in Harlem had died because of experiments, in Lagos because of a bomb. Enhanced people were not the ones to blame. Vigilantes and superheroes were not the ones to blame.

Why should he just lay down and take it, too afraid to fight back? Ned was doing it. Michelle was doing it. Both of them not for personal gain but rather, because of their morals. If they could fight back, why couldn't Spider-Man?

He dug the phone out of his closet. He could call Sam's team. Ask them in which ways he could help. It felt like an eternity, but it had barely been three months since the airport, and the Raft. What could they be doing? If-

His phone rang. Ned's ridiculous picture made him almost crack a smile. Then he remembered it was barely seven in the morning, on a Saturday.

"Ned? Everything okay?"

"I'm fine," he said, but his voice was tense. "But… You should come over later. I just discovered the _best_ , _worst_ thing ever. You'll hate it."

That was code for 'something has happened, but not to us'. Peter's mind went to the blackouts. "Alright. If they've nerfed another character, I'm making a formal complaint, just so you know."

They were careful not to talk about Spider-Man over the phone, so they'd come up with ways to get their point across without mentioning anything incriminating. It was working out okay so far.

After May woke up, he barely ate breakfast before shoving his suit in his backpack, kissing her goodbye and almost running out the door. Ned's apartment was close enough that he didn't need to take the bus anymore, not with his endurance.

Ned's mum opened the door with a smile, but Ned was dead serious. "I still think you guys are taking video gaming too seriously," she commented, to Ned's lamenting 'Mum!'

Before they could say anything else, Ned was dragging him into his room. "Look who's talking," he mumbled. "She's been beating Alice in their yearly gaming championships for three years straight, and bragging about it. But you didn't hear that from me."

"Ok, I didn't. So, what happened?"

Ned's room was a little bigger than his, the walls painted a very light blue. His desk was full of various projects, along with a couple of stray Lego pieces. Ned sat in his desk chair and turned on the computer screen.

"You heard about the blackouts, and about the demands, right?"

"Yeah."

There had been blackouts in major cities around the world, and the ones behind it demanded that a stop be put to the registration of enhanced people. Otherwise, the blackouts would get worse.

"First of all, it's fake. But that doesn't matter."

It didn't? At those words, Peter had felt the ground fall out from under his feet. Enhanced people got framed, inviting even more bad press than they already had. Who would stand with them if they were too afraid of them? Angry at them?

"Alice's friend, the one that came over yesterday afternoon? We got to talking, and she gave me some links. Look at this."

He shoved the screen closer to Peter. At first, he didn't understand what he was reading.

"No."

He stepped back in shock, until he bumped against the bed. He sat down heavily, putting his head in his hands.

"They're …dead?" The words came out muffled by his hands.

"Yeah," Ned frowned. "I'm sorry."

A government facility had been attacked. At least 17 'inhumans' had died. No, not died; they'd been murdered.

"I can tell them," he said through a bitter grimace. "I can tell the world everything. _Hell_ , Sam and the others can tell them, why are they not _saying_ anything?"

"I don't know," Ned said, turning off the screen. "It could be too dangerous if they're in hiding." He hesitated, eyebrows drawing together, considering, before he continued. "Maybe we should contact them."

"Maybe we should," Peter said, anger at the edges of his words, but not directed at the Avengers. He shoved his hand in his backpack, feeling the suit's smooth, deceptively thin texture. It took him a few seconds to find the phone he'd stashed in a small pocket.

"You're actually gonna call?" Ned's eyebrows climbed up to his hairline.

"Yeah."

His friend didn't exactly shake with excitement, but his eyes were gleaming. Peter himself felt worry close his throat up.

He called the lone number on the phone, and heard it ringing. Suddenly he was scared that all of this had been a lie, that the others were locked up and that this was a trap. That someone would break through the window and take him back to the Raft.

The ringing continued for about ten seconds before someone picked up.

"911, what's your emergency?"

What? Peter's brain screeched to a halt, until he processed the voice on the other end.

"Not an emergency, no," he said hurriedly, wanting to get it out of the way. "Uh, Mr… Sam? Is that you?" Ned was making questioning, alarmed faces, to which Peter shrugged helplessly.

"Yeah, kid, it's me," said Falcon, and Peter breathed a sigh of relief. "I couldn't really answer with pertinent information, who knows who it could be on the other end. So why _are_ you calling?" he asked, conversationally, and Peter imagined him lounging in a couch in some secret basement somewhere, or poring over maps of secret facilities. Who knew what the Rogue Avengers were doing lately? "I thought we said to call in an emergency?"

"This whole situation doesn't qualify as an emergency?"

"Oh, kid…" Sam almost sighed. "You have no idea what's coming."

For a second, Peter forgot about the Accords. "What do you mean? What's coming?" Ned's eyes widened, but at that point, his friend knew just as much as he did.

"If we knew, we wouldn't be having this conversation over the phone."

Peter didn't know what to ask about first, so he went back to the matter at hand. If the Avengers didn't know anything, what could Peter do?

"Okay. So, I called… well," he paused. "I called about the Accords. I want to know if there's any way I can help get them abolished. Or at least amended."

Sam didn't say anything for a few seconds. When he did, he seemed to choose his words.

"That will happen. Maybe not tomorrow, but soon. The Avengers will be needed to deal with what's coming; Earth, the Accords, it's all minor in comparison. And everyone will know it."

Peter tried to process the information, and he didn't like what the results were.

"So, what you're saying is, something so horrible is coming that everyone will realise how important letting the Avengers do their thing is?"

"Probably."

Ned's expression had gone from curious to slightly scared, and Peter could honestly say he was feeling exactly the same.

"Then, we're just gonna wait for the world to end," Peter said, just to make sure he understood that correctly.

"Yes. Before that, we'll see what our allies can do, working the legal angle. Just don't ask me about it, the specifics shouldn't really be discussed over the phone."

Allies. Peter didn't feel much better, but this was reassuring. It was not just them against the world anymore. He wondered who they were, but didn't think Sam would say. Better safe than sorry.

"Okay. How are the others?" he asked.

"They're as well as they can be," Sam said after a short pause. "It's a process, but the worst is far behind."

They were probably together, in a country that hadn't supported the Accords. There was a surprising number of them, actually. Seventy-six countries are a lot to choose from, and a lot to search. That is, if they didn't do the unexpected, hiding under everyone's noses somewhere where the Accords were in effect.

He didn't ask about that either.

"I'm… I'm glad. Thank you," he tried to put as much gratitude as he could in the words. Sam didn't owe him anything, he could probably be doing better things than reassuring Peter.

"It's alright. But I should go now."

"I promise," Peter said, "next time I'll call only about imminent danger."

"Let's hope not," Sam's voice almost betrayed a smile. The line went dead, but not before Peter heard the beginnings of commotion in the background.

"So… is the world ending?" Ned asked, with a terrified kind of curiosity.

"Looks like it."

…

He honestly should have been more concerned.

People had already died. Who knew how much more damage could be done, directly or indirectly helped by the Accords and caused by the looming threat both. But things were calm for the moment, and the impending doom on the horizon still only meant an almost sure-fire end to the Accords. Maybe he could even help the Avengers, once whatever was coming arrived.

A fight, he could handle much easier than international legislation.

He was getting back into crime-fighting shape quickly, and sometimes, he even patrolled without Ned's steadying voice in his ear. No need to make him lose sleep, especially with school in full swing. Peter had quit band and robotics when he'd found the workload too much to deal with, but Ned stuck with his extracurriculars like the responsible person that he was.

Ned had argued that Peter was responsible too, in his own way, and Peter was quietly pleased with himself. He knew he felt a responsibility, to do all that he could to save people. Somehow, hearing Ned's voice take that tone of pride was so much better.

Now that most of his worries had been put on the backburner, where he was forcibly keeping them, his life outside vigilantism was starting to worry him instead. School was normal enough, May was starting to look happier, seeing him happier. His romantic endeavours, however, were non-existent, which wouldn't normally be a problem, except this time, he wanted them to exist.

If only he could pull himself together enough to do something about his confused feelings. It had got to the point where Ned and Liz frequently featured in his dreams; his nightmares too, whenever they didn't take him back to the Raft. Where Ned was warm, and excitably familiar, Liz was new, an improbable adventure.

Of course, neither of them liked him. That put a wrench in his potential plans, but not a stop. Looking over at the skyline of New York as the sun was setting, he tried to come up with romantic date ideas that didn't include crimefighting. Maybe minimal crimefighting, in Ned's case.

"That lady was so nice though," his friend said in his ear. The fire escape under him creaked slightly when he laughed.

"I know right? How's the robot coming along?"

"Great, actually. Pretty sure I can convince them the spider theme is a coincidence, if I-" Ned cut himself off, letting out a slight hiss of pain. He sighed. "If I stop accidentally burning myself, I might even finish it in time."

"What are you making, anyway?" Peter asked. Ned hadn't been very forthcoming with the details for a while now.

"You'll have to wait and see. I'm hoping to have it ready by Christmas," Ned said absentmindedly. "A holiday present for our very own friendly neighbourhood Spider-Man."

Peter's heart right about grew three sizes. He needed to reconsider his plans for Ned's gift, because evidently what he had in mind would not quite measure up.

"Aw, and I didn't get you anything," he said, not serious.

"Your eternal love and gratitude will suffice," Ned spoke through an almost audible grin. His tone wasn't entirely teasing.

Maybe his chances with Ned were not as close to zero as he thought.

Peter was torn away from his already distracting thoughts by the sight of armed robbers getting into the bank on 21st street.

Ned's faint warning to be careful put a smile on Peter's face as he swung down from the fire escape. Adrenaline rushed in his veins at the sight of the strange weapons the robbers were holding. Normal police definitely couldn't deal with that kind of thing.

Spider-Man was needed, and Spider-Man would be there.

**Author's Note:**

> And we end, right at the beginning of this universe's Homecoming plot. I hope you enjoyed it! Some notes. While the themes of this were easier for me, it took me more than a month to finally write it, because I didn't really have a clear vision of where it was going. I knew I wanted the hurt/comfort, and the consequences, and I didn't want to let the Accords stay uncontested, but that was about it. Note that I don't watch Agents of Shield, so all I know about the attack I took from the wikis. I'd welcome you to try and imagine Tumblr in the MCU, but... I really don't wanna know. Ned has a sister, bc I have character profiles for each of the Homecoming gang. They are full of headcanons but I love them all the same.
> 
> I think there's going to be at least one more part in this series, in the future. If Infinity War or even Black Panther doesn't inspire me for a storyline connected to this, I'd like to see what Homecoming would be like in this universe (and maybe Peter and Ned will finally get together lol). Thanks for reading, leave a review if you like!
> 
> EDIT (July '18): I'm about halfway through writing Hoco, and already have a plan for Infinity War, so I guess there will be more parts to this. Stay tuned for when the muse wins and makes me finish another installment :D


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